Day One

So I've finally decided this is it. I've had enough. I'm going to beat this. I'm going to hold my head high and say "I did it!"

This is day one of being a reformed smoker.

This is day one of a healthier new me.

This is day one of my new life.

Oh dear Lord! What the hell have I done? There appears to be a good indicator that I may go to gaol for murder.

It appears that now I've decided to quit that people have decided to up their stupidity. Yeah, I didn't think it was possible either but apparently it is. Who knew?

Concentration is shot to pieces. My irritability is sky high and my short fuse is now ever shorter. One more person refers to me as cheerful is going to be eating through a straw for the next three months.

The hammers in my brain are banging out a beat like something that even Rebecca Black would turn her nose up at. It's all I can do not to yell and scream. I started to yell before... I never realised my voice could his such a high pitch. I think I may need to check that I still have testicles and haven't grown a vagina over night.

I'm not going cold turkey. I've tried that before. I nearly had to move out. Now, instead I have patches. Little round sticky things that release nicotine into my body. I'm not 100% sure that it's working or if it's just sitting on my shoulder taunting me that I should roll it and smoke it. No, no bad thoughts. Can't smoke the plastic patch.

I was in the bathroom before and saw a guy looking back at me. I started to mouth off asking what he was looking at. Told him a picture will last longer. About 2.5 minutes into my verbal abuse I stopped. I looked at the guy again. Well bugger me if I wasn't yelling at my mirror reflection. Time to clean my glasses.

I'm determined I can do this. I've had enough. I don't like my mouth tasting like an ashtray. The constant burned feeling in my mouth. I want to be able to breathe easier, live to see ... well ... something interesting I'm sure. Until then, I'll just breathe through the pain. Stop smirking at me... I'm in pain here!